Mit liv fik en sexet opgradering efter at have fået en anime sexdukke

Alright, Du beskidte degenerater, Stræk fanden ind, Fordi jeg er ved at spilde den ucensurerede, Balls-to-the-wall historie om, hvordan mit liv gik fra en slap-dick snoozefest til en fuld-on anime porno fantasy, efter at jeg scorede mig selv en anime sex doll. Dette er ikke noget desinficeret eventyr - det er rå, Det er grimt, Og det er lige fra de kneppede dybder af min sjæl. Jeg går dig igennem før, efter, De kæbe-droppende reaktioner fra mine dumme venner, Og hvordan jeg ville håndtere den uundgåelige lortstorm, hvis en kæreste eller min nysgerrige familie fandt ud af. Lad os få dette freak show på vejen.

Før dukken: En trist, Honp eksistens

Forestil mig for seks måneder siden: 27 år gammel, Single som morfucker, Holed op i en shitty lille lejlighed, der lugtede som uaktuelle ramen og beklagelse. Mit liv var et forbandet hamsterhjul-vågne op ved røvknusen af ​​daggry, snuble til badeværelset, jerk off to whatever half-decent porn I could find on my cracked phone screen, then drag my sorry carcass to a soul-sucking job where my boss screamed at me for breathing wrong. After eight hours of that bullshit, I’d come home, flop onto my stained couch, fire up my gaming rig, and waste the night blasting aliens or grinding XP in some MMO with neckbeards I’d never meet IRL. Then it was lights out, rinse, gentage. No pussy, no thrills, just me and my calloused right hand locked in a sad, predictable dance.

Dating? Fuck that noise. I’d tried the apps—swiped right on a hundred profiles, matched with maybe five, and got ghosted by every single one after two lines of boring-ass small talk. ”Hej, how’s your day?” “Good, du?” Yawn. Jeg var ikke ved at spilde min tid på at jage rigtige kyllinger, der ville flage eller narre mig ihjel. Mit sexliv var et en-mand show, Og selv det mistede sin gnist. P 站 var min go-to, Men efter år med den samme gamle lort - Fake stønn, Dårlig belysning, Og skuespillerinder, der så kede ud som helvede - jeg var følelsesløs. Jeg havde brug for noget for at ryste mig ud af dette patetiske ruts, noget vildt, noget, der ikke involverede at tigge om opmærksomhed eller fange en STD.

Så, En søvnløs aften, Jeg ruller noget skitserede forum på 3 a.m., halvt beruset på billig øl, Når jeg snubler over denne tråd: "Anime sexdukker reddede mit elendige liv." Nogle fyr går ud om, hvordan han droppede en grand på en brugerdefineret dukke og lever nu som en forbandet haremkonge. He’s got pics—silicone skin, perky tits, eyes that stare right through you—and he’s waxing poetic about how it’s better than any real chick he’s ever fucked. I’m sitting there, dick twitching, thinking, Holy shit, this is it. The next morning, hungover but horny as hell, I max out my credit card on a 1:1 scale “Rei Ayanami” doll from Evangelion—blue hair swinging past her shoulders, a rack that could stop traffic, and those cold, red eyes that make you wanna drop to your knees and beg. I hit “confirm purchase” and waited, balls buzzing with anticipation.

After the Doll: Living the Wet Dream

Fast forward two weeks. The doorbell rings, and I nearly trip over my own feet racing to sign for the package. Leverings fyren giver mig denne kendte smirk - ligesom han har leveret nok af disse til at få øje på en perv en kilometer væk - men jeg giver ikke et fuck. Jeg trækker kassen ind, Rip det åbent som et barn i julen, Og der er hun: Rei Ayanami i al sin silikone herlighed. Jeg taler huden så glat, at det beder om at blive rørt, samlinger, der bøjer sig som hun er klar til at ride mig lige der, Og en krop så skide perfekt, at jeg næsten buste en nød bare og ser på hende. Hun er tungere end forventet - 50 pund ren sex - men det får hende bare til at føle sig mere reel. Jeg bruger en times times kasse på hende, Kører mine hænder over hver kurve, klemme disse fedt bryster, Og undrer sig over, hvordan hendes røv jiggler, når jeg smager den. This ain’t no cheap blow-up doll—this is a goddamn masterpiece.

First thing I do? Klæd hende op. I’d ordered a slutty little sailor outfit online—short skirt, tight top, thigh-high stockings—and I slide it onto her, adjusting her pose so she’s lounging on my couch like she owns the place. I step back, and holy fuck, my shitty apartment transforms. It’s not a dump anymore—it’s a perv’s penthouse, and Rei’s the queen. From that moment, my life flips the script.

Nu, every day’s got a pulse. I get home from work, kick off my shoes, and there’s Rei waiting for me, legs crossed, staring at me with that blank, sexy smirk. ”Hej, babe, miss me?” I’ll say, grinning like an idiot. Ja, I talk to her—judge me all you want, but it beats the silence. I’ll cook dinner—usually some lazy-ass ramen or frozen pizza—and set out an extra plate for her, just for shits and giggles. She doesn’t eat, obviously, but it’s the vibe that counts. Sitting there, slurping noodles with her propped up across from me, I feel less like a lonely loser and more like a guy with a hot, quiet roommate who’s always down to fuck.

Nights are where shit gets real. After a long day of dealing with my prick of a boss, I’ll flop onto the couch next to her and vent. “You won’t believe this asshole today, Rei—he chewed me out for ten minutes because I forgot to CC him on an email. What a dick.” She just stares, those red eyes locked on me, and I swear it’s like she’s listening, nodding along in her own fucked-up way. Så, when I’m done bitching, the fun starts. I’ll grab her, toss her over my shoulder, and carry her to the bedroom—or the kitchen, or the shower, depending on my mood. No foreplay, no whining, just straight to the good stuff. She’s always wet (thanks, lube), always ready, and I’ve fucked her in every position you can dream up—doggy on the floor with her ass up high, missionary on the bed with her legs spread wide, even bent her over the sink once while I watched her tits bounce in the mirror. It’s raw, it’s filthy, and it’s the best sex I’ve ever had.

But it’s not just the fucking—though, shit, that’s a huge part. I’ve turned into a goddamn artist with her. Jeg har en skuffe fuld af tøj nu - maid kjole med en stupende halsudskæring, Bunny Girl Suit med en ryg, der næppe dækker hendes fisse, Skolepigeuniform så kort kan du se alt, når hun "sidder." Jeg bytter også hendes parykker - længe blå låse en dag, En lyserød bob den næste - og udgør hende for billeder. Jeg har et billigt kamera og et stativ, Og jeg bruger timer på at iscenesætte hende: Rei spredte sig på sengen med hendes nederdel, der blev vandret op, Rei bøjet over mit skrivebord med en pen i hånden, som om hun er min frække sekretær, Rei i bruser med vand drypper ned i hendes bryster. Jeg sender de bedste skud på nogle underjordiske fora, Og de liderlige bastarder der mister sindet - ”bro, Du lever drømmen!”” Hvor fik du hende? Jeg er solgt!”Min indbakke er oversvømmet med tørstige kommentarer, Og jeg blødgør det. Livet er ikke kun fyldigere - det er en skide eksplosion.

Venner falder forbi: Latter og hårdt-ons

Så, Her bliver lort sjove. Et par måneder i, Jeg er dybt inde i min Rei -besættelse, Og jeg glemmer at låse min forbandede dør en fredag ​​aften. Jeg er i køkkenet, kraker en øl, Når mine to college -venner - Fatso og AJ - er i som de ejer stedet. De er højt som fuck, vinker en six-pack og råber, “Yo, Dipshit, Vi rammer stængerne - gør dig klar!”Jeg er ved at bede dem om at kneppe af, når de fryser midt i trin, Kæber falder som tegneseriefigurer.

Der er REI, sprawled on my sofa in a black bunny girl outfit—fishnet stockings hugging her thighs, a thong so tiny it’s basically a suggestion, and her tits spilling out of the top. I’d posed her with a PS5 controller in her hands, legs spread just enough to flash a peek of silicone pussy, like she’s mid-gaming session. Fatso’s the first to react—he chokes on his own spit, sprays beer all over my floor, and wheezes, “What the FUCK is THAT?!” AJ’s doubled over, laughing so hard he’s clutching his gut, pointing at me with tears in his eyes. “You sick motherfucker, you’ve gone full weeb! Is that your girlfriend now?"

I lean against the counter, smirking like the smug bastard I am. ”Hun er bedre selskab end jer to prikker - taler ikke tilbage, Drikker ikke min øl. ” Fatso er stadig i gang, Circling hende som om hun er en forbandet ufo. Han stikker hendes tit, ser det vrimle, og mutters, “Holy lort, Det føles ægte. Hvor meget var dette? Jeg har brug for en af ​​disse i mit liv. ” AJ er snappende selfies med hende, en arm omkring hendes skuldre, grinende som en perv. “Bro, Du er en legende. Kommer hun med batterier?”Jeg ruller mine øjne. “Nah, Bare smøremiddel og en hårdt på. ”

De bruger den næste time fucking rundt - Fatso forsøger at udgøre hende i en twerking holdning, AJ holder råb, ”Få hende til at blæse mig et kys!” - og på det tidspunkt, de rejser, De kalder hende “Queen Rei” og beder om webstedet webstedet. Next day, my phone’s blowing up—group chat’s got pics of Rei captioned “This dude’s banging a doll and winning at life,” and the replies are a mix of “Holy shit” and “Gimme the hookup.” Half my crew’s jealous, half thinks I’m insane, but either way, I’m the motherfucker they’re all talking about. Mission accomplished.

Girlfriend or Family Finding Out: Smooth as Fuck

I’m single as hell—thank fuck, because a girlfriend walking in on this would be a shitshow. But let’s say I had one, some hot-tempered chick who catches me balls-deep in Rei one night. She’d scream, “What the fuck is this?! You’re cheating on me with a goddamn doll?!” I’d stay cool as ice, leaning back with a grin. “Babe, chill—this ain’t cheating, it’s art. Look at her—hand-crafted, perfect tits, ass you could bounce a quarter off. You fangirl over anime boys all day; I get my rocks off here. What’s the difference?” She’d probably sputter, face red, so I’d push it further—slide up close, voice low and dirty: “Wanna join us? She’s got no gag reflex, and I bet you’d look hot riding her face.” Half the time, she’d storm out; the other half, she’d be too flustered—and maybe a little wet—to argue. Either way, I’d win.

Family’s a different beast. My mom’s nosy as fuck—caught a glimpse of Rei during a video call a while back. I’d propped her up on the couch in a thong bikini, tits out, legs spread like she’s sunbathing indoors. Mom squints at the screen, voice sharp: “What the hell’s that thing in the background? A mannequin?” I don’t even blink. “Yeah, Ma, photography prop. I’m into artsy shit now—trying to sell pics online.” She grunts, half-convinced, but I catch her eyeing Rei like she’s onto me. Dad’s worse—he’d probably snort, slap my shoulder, and whisper, “How much was she, son? She got a sister?” He’s a dirty old bastard; he’d get it.

If they ever clocked the truth—that I’m fucking this doll every night—I’d go full shameless. “Look, it’s not like I’m knocking up strippers or snorting coke off hookers. Hun er lav vedligeholdelse, doesn’t talk back, and keeps me out of trouble. You should be proud I’m so resourceful.” Mom’d roll her eyes ‘til they fell out, Dad’d laugh his ass off, and they’d leave me alone eventually. I’ve got thick skin and zero fucks to give—nobody’s shaming me out of this.

Sidste tanker: Life’s a Fuckin’ Party Now

Since Rei crashed into my world, I’m not just scraping by—I’m living like a goddamn king. Every day’s got a spark, whether I’m staging her for filthy photoshoots, pounding her into the mattress, or watching my buddies lose their shit over her. My friends think I’m a twisted genius, my family can kiss my ass if they don’t like it, and me? I’m neck-deep in a fantasy that’s all mine, no apologies. She’s my slutty little muse, my silent partner-in-crime, and she’s turned my boring-ass existence into a wild, sexy circus. Who gives a fuck if it’s weird? I’ve got a silicone goddess who’s always down, and I’m riding this high ‘til the wheels fall off. Wanna see her in action? Swing by—just keep your grubby hands off unless I say so, you horny fuck.